I’m Fat and Yes, I Still Benefit From Thin Privilege
The checkout lady is eyeing my body in juxtaposition to the ice cream I’ve put on the conveyor belt. As a long time fatty, I’ve often treated the act of eating as private, even a secret on occasion. Because of course, fat bodies have to feed themselves, but when others see a fat body eating, they treat it as an invitation to scrutinize, insult, and mock. Grocery shopping has never been any different. Strangers have often commented on the contents of my cart, asking me if I knew the pitfalls of including carbs in my diet, or if I’d ever tried the paleo diet to lose weight.
The way the checkout lady is watching my rolls, I know she wants to say something. She’s got the aura of the health crusader — those extra self-righteous strangers who want to tell you all about your health based on a glance at your size. Maybe I simply don’t know I’m fat, she might be wondering. Maybe I just need someone to shame me into making better choices, like publicly calling me out for buying a pint of vegan ice cream.
“You sure found the ice cream,” she says, glancing downward at my stomach. Much like a dog with a favorite chew toy, she won’t let it go. She won’t stop mentioning the ice cream even as it’s already disappeared into my grocery bag. In a different time, I would probably say something. I would probably demand her to just say what she meant…
